ConTuesday! Poly, pregnancy, and purity
According to Edgar Watson Howe, “The man who can keep a secret may be wise, but he is not half as wise as the man with no secrets to keep.” I’m not sure if that’s even marginally true, nor how exciting Edgar’s sex life was, but I do know that I love ConTuesday. Here, have some sex confessions!
I wish my girlfriend would fuck someone else a few times. (sounds a bit crass when put that way) We were both virgins when we first decided to share our bodies, but the problem is that she still acts like a virgin despite the couple of years that we’ve been together. It’s impossible to experiment, even dirty talk still embarrasses her, and she has no real sex drive and can’t seem to tell me when she wants sex. Coming from someone with exactly the same amount of experience this may seem presumptuous, but I really think she might change if she stopped thinking of herself in the same virginal light.
I give myself enemas all the time. Sexually. It’s awesome. I have no poop fetish, I don’t get off on the poop part, (in fact I have to fastforward past the “expulsion” scenes in enema porn) I just love the feeling of my ass being completely filled up. I wish I had a bigger enema kit so I could give myself HUGE amounts of water.
I’m in a polyamorous relationship with my wonderful fiance. We each have a couple secondary relationships that are completely above board. He thinks that this is the first time I haven’t cheated in a relationship, but he’s wrong. I’m maintaining a secret affair with a guy he really doesn’t like. My fiance would be stressed out if I told him about it because he doesn’t trust my lover, but it wouldn’t be a dealbreaker and he’d never give me an ultimatum. I could be honest. The thing is, I just love the rush of doing it in secret.
The worst part is, I know the fact I’m lying would devastate him.
Psychologists say that paraphilias often evolve from phobias, which in my case is totally true, in that lately I have been so turned on by pregnancy: the thought of getting pregnant, being pregnant — I’ve even been looking at pregnancy porn! In real life, I only want to actually have maybe two kids, but that doesn’t stop me from masturbating furiously to it.
I use the web site Nookist to keep track of my sex life, just for fun. If you go a certain length of time without updating, they send a message asking you where you’ve been. I always feel like it’s adding insult to injury – I’ve been a long time without sex, and now the internet is mocking me?! Trust me, I know I haven’t had sex in a month. I know that well.
That would be a damn depressing email to arrive in one’s inbox: “Ohai. We’ve noticed you’re not getting any. WHY NOT?”
I’d been dating a guy for about 8 months long distance. I was planning a trip to go to his place for a week over the summer. A few days before I left, my mom sat me down told me all about her bloody (seriously – she said she bled through the mattress), painful, awful virginity story to discourage my from losing my virginity… six months after I already had. I just kind of nodded and thought to myself, “Huh. Guess I’m lucky mine was good, then!” She still thinks I was “innocent” for months longer than I was.
I think if virgin girlfriend fucked someone else she’d just be uncommunicative and low-sex-drive with someone else. Probably not the problem here.