Bumpy ride
Hopeless tool of the patriarchy that I am, I just don’t like having very much pubic hair. I’ve been shaving to various degrees since I was sixteen, even though no one was helping me enjoy it until two years after that. It’s a tactile thing: I like feeling smoothness when I play with myself; I don’t want hair dampening sensation. To me, a shaved pussy doesn’t look much– if at all– better, and as long as I can sort out what’s where I don’t mind other people maintaining a healthy bush themselves.
But I’ve always had different standards for myself than I have for others. That’s why I feel confident saying you’re a degenerate for reading this smut.
In the realm of pussyshaving, though, you know what I hate? Razor burn. I hate it with the passion that we reserve for those who disagree with our politics and cut in front of us in line. It itches, and looks ugly, and sometimes even hurts (especially if you try to shave over it). I’m going out on a limb and guessing that every person who’s ever seen me naked, and not mentioned a razor burn that I had at all, didn’t exactly swoon over it either. I only fuck the brave, oblivious and/or polite, apparently.
Because, you see, I tend to get it a lot. Those chicks with gorgeously naked genitals swathed in silky, flawless skin? I’m not sure what they’re doing but I suspect they’re not shaving. Or maybe they are, and my skin is even more sensitive and fussy than I thought. Or I’m a Oh God I’m a freak of nature, aren’t I?
Bikini Zone cream has always helped the issue, but I accidentally transferred it from my hands to my lips after applying once, and the taste is not something you want on your pussy unless you’ve utterly despaired of getting oral sex that day. So there went that solution.
It’s actually been a lot better lately because I’m following the rule of only shaving with the grain of hair growth, which I used to think was for pussies. It turns out that it really, truly is, and should be observed accordingly. I’m also shaving a little less often (mostly because I’m exhausted and therefore not as precious about my bush these days), and conscientiously applying coconut oil after shaving.
Still, based on the recommendation of some head-shaving friends, I’m wondering if a safety razor is actually a gentler, superior shave, or just makes them feel like fancy gentlemen. Also, if this stuff works.
Look into sugaring. It doesn’t hurt your skin like waxing, and if you exfoliate your skin with a brush before every shower, you don’t get ingrown hairs. I cannot shave my mons at all, I get such disgusting razor burn/ingrown hairs that it looks like I’m diseased. But I like being smooth, too. Oddly enough, shaving my labia is fine, but I prefer the sugaring.
*nodding vigorously at Christina* Sugaring is definitely the way to go, and the dry-brushing technique makes all the difference in the world.
One enjoys a clear playing field.
Oh, and speaking of the damsel in the photo… I remember the shock of the ungroomed bush sighting at the end of The Wings Of The Dove. End of the film. Helena B-C looked so hot and angsty as she and her lover both admit they were in love with the ingenue who recently died, and they know she’d been in love with both of them. They pile balefully into bed for some sad, consolation sex, she unpeels from the corset looking very sad and *SPROING* comes the unfettered au naturel of Our Heroine. Was shocking, because one never sees natural bush in big-time cinema. FWIW, I thought it was hot.
As a safety razor shaver myself, I wouldn’t say it’s a better shave* than modern multiblade cartridge systems or disposables. The main advantage is cost; it’s an _equivalent_ shave for far, far less money.
[* - Sole exception: a safety razor is a thousand times better at removing hair that's grown out. When removing facial or body hair after a month of nongrooming, my safety razor won't clog up like modern razors always did.]
Coochy Cream rocks. I’d definitely try it. I love it and have used it for years.
I just trim mine down with a beard trimmer now, and it ends up being about the same as a week’s worth of growth. I like it much better, and in fact feel way more confident with that short hair then I did when I shaved it all off. That’s just me, though.
I’ve stuck with a safety razor since I don’t shave often and it doesn’t clog as mentioned above. I also agree it’s not an amazing improvement over multi-blades, but it gets the same job done as comfortably and a lot more cheaply. Plus, what’s not to like about good tools with real heft to them?
I did go back to Edge Gel however. The whole brush and shave soap thing didn’t work well for me. Might be more fun for you though!
classicshaving.com is where I get my stuff. Guy oriented, but worth the specialization over amazon I think.
Lazer. Expensive, but it works.
OOH, LASER! I’d get laser if I could afford it, and it’s definitely on my “things to acquire in the future”. I’d get my pits done, too…
I feel your pain, hon. I get awful razor burn if I’m not careful. I’ve found a few things that help. One is putting conditioner (whatever I’m using on my head-hair) on the whole area and letting it sit for a while as I take my shower. Then, I shave while it’s still on (for me, just my mons, because that’s where I have the most problems). It really softens things up, and many conditioners have silicone in them, which helps the razor glide instead of tug.
Some multi-blade lines make cartridges that are “hypoallergenic” or “sensitive skin”. Basically, no nickle etc in the blades or cartridge, extra moisturizers in the gel band, sometimes antimicrobials impregnated in the blades. I’ve got a nickle sensitivity, so for me that makes a big difference.
The last thing is the one that makes the most difference, for me. Right after you dry off from the shower, gently roll some unscented (or just powder scented) solid deodorant over the problem areas. I’ve been using it on thighs and mons for years, though I’ve never tried the lips. It makes sense – they formulate those things to prevent razorburn and redness and irritation from popping up in our pits after we shave, so we know they work!
Coochy Cream is amazing. Have you ever shaved with hair conditioner? It’s kind of like that, but a bajillion times better. I felt terribly silly buying a separate shaving cream just for my crotch, but it was sooo worth it.
I’m just glad for all the suggestions in the post and comments, because man do I have horrible razor burn all the time.
Great comments, everyone! So much information. I haven’t tried sugaring, but it sounds like something I should at least try. I wish I could get laser hair removal, but it’s not in my budget for this ever. Speaking of budget, perhaps my next razor purchase will be a safety razor, since cartridges for my stupid Venus whatever are obscene (wonder if safety razor blades come in hypoallergenic/nickle-free…). I never even thought of using deodorant; that’s worth trying too. And I pretty much have to buy Coochy Cream at some point. Thanks, everybody!
P.S. Now I think I need to Netflix The Wings Of The Dove.
Lily, you’re a genius. I have a nickel allergy and it just never occurred to me that hypoallergenic razors existed. Not sure how much of a difference it’ll make, but it’s worth a shot!
From what I could tell when I sold the stuff, Coochie Cream IS basically conditioner! You can prolly find a conditioner with similar “soothing” elements… one of my coworkers used to swear by silicone gel-style lubricant, but that stuff’s WAY too expensive to use for shaving, IMHO. also, Aveeno makes 3 different shave gels for sensitive, bump-prone skin. I personally use one of those Suave 2-in-1 shampoo/conditioners; it’s not as thick and razor-clogging as straight up conditioner, but it’s still pretty, um, viscous?
BTW, if you’re not already using a safety razor, what are you using?
^^ I’ve used cheapy silicone lube for shaving. It works great, but it clogs up razors like crazy, and my skin has expensive taste in razors . . . so, no go there. The Aveeno gel did not work for me at all — doesn’t do a damn thing to protect my skin. I will use it on my legs but not on my crotch. I’ve had the same container of the stuff for months now, ’cause I pull it out so infrequently.
QP, if what you’re allergic to is nickle, you could always try carbon (non-stainless) double edged blades with a safety razor. I assume they’re a simple carbon steel: just iron and carbon. As an added bonus, they’re often the dead cheapest blades available, and can work better than stainless. As with knives, carbon steel is just awesome.
The trade off is that they take maintenance. If you want use a blade more than once, you need to protect it or all the water will make it rust. I know safety razor shavers who keep a tightly sealed little mason jar of 95% rubbing alcohol next to the sink and dunk the whole razor after shaving; the alcohol displaces any clinging water droplets, and evaporates right away. It’s more trouble than I’ve been willing to take, and it’s probably less of an issue with body hair (it’s possible I’m being too fastidious, but I use a fresh blade for each session when removing body hair; facial hair seems much less demanding).
Some of the dedicated online shaving suppliers offer sampler packs of their various double edged packs so you can see what you like.
UnderTheDark, in the world of shaving nerds, “safety razor” refers specifically to old fashioned razors that use the now-standardized double edged razor blades, as opposed to the modern multiblade cartridge systems, which are developed less to improve the customer’s experience and more to restart the patent clock and prevent third-party manufacturers from undercutting the big manufacturers’ prices. It’s pretty much the same business model printers run on (the doodad’s pretty cheap, but the refills are exorbitantly overpriced), but with little to no actual improvements outside the marketing hype. ;)
My boyfriend keeps the blade to his razor in an airtight container of vodka when he’s not using it. It dissolves the little comfort gel strip, but the blade stays sharp and doesn’t rust.
Razor ‘burn’ is actually low level infection around breaks in the skin. There are two strategies to get rid of it 1) don’t break the skin 2) don’t let it get infected.
I’m a guy, but I have very sensitive skin (genetic), and I have also shaved partners’ body hair (with a straight razor in one case… so hot) without problems so I feel somewhat qualified to comment.
Regarding 1 :
– Good lather is the basis of any decent shave. If the blade doesn’t glide over the skin rather than scraping across it nothing else you do will make a blind bit of difference. I personally get best results with a lather made of half generic shaving soap, half Dove with a good badger brush. The dove massively improves razor glide. Razor glide is better if the skin is already really clean (the grease breaks down the soap lather), so give it a gentle scrub first. Lather up after each pass.
– Hair hydration : Hair becomes dramatically easier to cut when it has absorbed water. Shave right after you shower while the room is nice and steamy, or leave the lather for a few minutes and then re-later before shaving.
– Pressure : if you press hard the blade will start to scrape the skin. If you shave the way people do in adverts you’ll make face into prosciutto. Use the lightest pressure possible.
– Blade : If your blade is dull you’ll have to press harder to make it work which will scrape the skin.
– Skin tension : If your skin has no tension it will sneak up between the blades and yet again, scraped skin. You need to apply a little tension with your other hand, ideally pulling in the opposite direction to razor movement. Too much tension will shave too close and probably give you ingrown hairs.
– Direction : If you shave against the hair straight off the razor will have a hard time cutting it, the skin around the hair will pucker up and get scraped. Voila, shave bumps. Start by shaving with the grain, then across the grain and then finally against the grain on the third pass. You can probably stop after the second pass and get decently smooth skin. The skin tension thing is _super_ important on the against the grain pass to avoid the puckering around each hair.
– Razor : Actually less important than good technique really, but I love my gillette ‘fat boy’ adjustable because i can dial the blade exposure right down for the against the grain pass. Multi blade razors aren’t terrible when new, but safety razors (aka double-edge / DE) make it cheap to use a fresh blade every couple of shaves which makes a lot of difference.
Now, assuming you’ve cocked up your shave and your skin is covered in tiny cuts, how can you stop them getting infected?
– Pat dry, don’t rub.
– Treat with something antibacterial. Tea tree, alum etc.
– Don’t touch the area unless you have just washed your hands
– Keep it dry and let the air get to it for a bit.
– Sterilise your razor before use in alcohol